Suggestions for Kevin Clarke's Temporary Replacement

Kevin Clarke, Kepphill, Arnprior, By Kippen, FK8 3EW

Kevin Clarke is set to retire on 31 March 2012 from his position of University Secretary for University of Stirling. May I respectfully suggest that he leave right now.

Of course, that will mean finding a temporary replacement of at least equal competence to fill the position until a permanent replacement can be found.

May I please ask for your suggestions. You can be as anonymous as you like. But please remember your suggestion must have competence equal to or greater than that of Mr Clarke. I will take a very dim view of any suggestions that do not meet the basic requirement, and they will not be added to the suggestion list below.

The temporary replacement must not cost any more than Mr Clarke's estimated £150,000 per year salary.

You can either post your suggestions in a comment, or email me at:


1 The space that he normally takes up.

2 The cat that the woman put in the bin.

3 The woman that put the cat in the bin.

4 The bin.

5 Eileen Schofield.

6 Eileen MacDonald.

7 A little turd.

8 "Professor" David Donaldson

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